Day 51: Tangled Tuesday
I had seen an art rendition of this word. I had been pondering this image for days. Yesterday, I decided to go ahead and draw it. This would be a great word to make into art. As I was working on the word my son from Albuquerque walks in with a girl that he use to date and is friends with and starts to talk to us.
I can tell that this is not a discussion I want to be apart. I just want to look down and continue with drawing and coloring this word. Just leave me alone, just today. Tomorrow I will deal with any problems or information you want me to handle. That was not my luck. The girl is holding a frame with a certificate in it. This is not a certificate I want to see. It has the letter ‘M’ starting some word. Oh no. It is not a word I want to see. It is not an action I want to hear about. Not from a 19 year old. No, life is for enjoying not for committing to so soon.
Oh yes. If you are thinking the word – “Marriage”. That is it. Bingo. My new daughter-in-law hands the certificate to my husband and I don’t know what he is doing with it but it is keeping it away from me on purpose. Everyone, my parents, my husband, my son and my new daughter-in-law are not wanting to see my reaction to this information.
But I still can shock everyone. I, finally, get the certificate and there is it. My son married her in April 2015. It is now January 2016. Hello! I calmly hand it back and state that it was performed in April of last year. Why did you want until now to tell me?
I have been with them. He told me that he was not seeing her and not involved with her in anyway. He was flat out lying. My folks state that he was scared and that was the reason and that made it okay. THAT IS NOT OKAY. But HE DID. I don’t want to say anything more than that.
There is more but I do not want to discuss it for all to know for forever to have a record of it. UHGGGGGGGGGGGG. Love is so special. Don’t forget that. Put that in the place of all the mess.
Okay. She is not horrible nor does she treat my son bad but I don’t know how righteous she will be. I don’t think she will follow the Lord. I just wanted someone that will love the Lord first and then my son second. But when it is the other way around you can make excuses and problems will come in but it is a co-dependent relationship.
That is the rant for today.
I have removed some words here that could be harmful to people involved. I am not perfect. I am not ready to say Kumbawa yet either. Do I want to have a good relationship with them? Yes. However, the issue has always be trust. Everyone, always says poor child. No one ever says poor parent. When they have put so many years of blood, sweat and tears into raising a child. I know no one is perfect. How is it that everyone is telling me that I am evil because I am upset that I was lied to again and again. I am suppose to turn the other cheek. Well, I have and I was lied to there and more that this. I have giving all I can.
I want to have a good relationship of trust with my son. How do I do that if he is always dishonest with me? My door will always be open for a relationship but I am not going to try every week to make something work that is not ready to be fix.
I am tired. I am also tired of everyone telling me I am not allowed to be upset. Would you be upset if you found out that you were lied to again?
I know that I have ranted here. But I am trying to make this a blog about my life as well as my art. I did not do this where everyone is reading, like on Facebook or Instagram. I get a whole 5 visiting a day. I don’t even talked to that many people in a week in person. So, cut me some slack. This is my voice with the outside world. If I had a girlfriend or friend to talk to maybe I would not have said things here but I don’t. I live too many miles away from people and the friends I have are too busy to even read that I had something happen in my life or talk to me.
I truly hope they are happy together. I probably would not have been so upset if they had done this a few years from now after they have lived a little. May God bless them as they do what is right.